A Hero at Heart.

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Wed, 19 Jun 2013 22:24:28 -0400

what if tattoos just randomly appeared on our skin at key points in our lives and we had to figure...

Wed, 19 Jun 2013 22:22:18 -0400

what if tattoos just randomly appeared on our skin at key points in our lives and we had to figure out what they meant for ourselves

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Wed, 19 Jun 2013 22:21:50 -0400

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Wed, 19 Jun 2013 22:19:05 -0400

Just thought I should let you know you are very cute [:

Wed, 19 Jun 2013 22:17:44 -0400

Well thank you very much :) I always appreciate a compliment even if you are anon

fr4nk-the-bunny: self-distructive: myandrogynousthoughts: stac...

Wed, 19 Jun 2013 13:58:59 -0400

fr4nk-the-bunny:

self-distructive:

myandrogynousthoughts:

stacy04:

kept-it-ugly:

reblogging so this can ruin someone else’s day too

i just keep watching it thinking “oh shit here comes another table..”

OH HOW THE TABLES HAVE CONTINUOUSLY TURNED

I can’t keep up with ur turning tables

when does it reset?

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Wed, 19 Jun 2013 13:56:12 -0400

so-personal: relatable/humor blog if you Don’t smile I will...

Wed, 19 Jun 2013 13:55:05 -0400

so-personal:

relatable/humor blog if you Don’t smile I will personally cook you a pizza ♡

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Wed, 19 Jun 2013 13:29:31 -0400

wicked-youth: Below photos:” im lonely ;( looking for a tumblr girlfriend” Me: throws up

Wed, 19 Jun 2013 13:26:41 -0400

wicked-youth:

Below photos:” im lonely ;( looking for a tumblr girlfriend”
Me: *throws up*

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Wed, 19 Jun 2013 13:24:32 -0400

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Wed, 19 Jun 2013 13:15:27 -0400

so-personal: relatable/humor blog if you Don’t smile I will...

Wed, 19 Jun 2013 13:12:42 -0400

so-personal:

relatable/humor blog if you Don’t smile I will personally cook you a pizza ♡

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Wed, 19 Jun 2013 13:08:15 -0400

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Wed, 19 Jun 2013 13:07:47 -0400

so-personal: relatable/humor blog if you Don’t smile I will...

Wed, 19 Jun 2013 13:05:58 -0400

so-personal:

relatable/humor blog if you Don’t smile I will personally cook you a pizza ♡

Just fabulous

Wed, 19 Jun 2013 12:57:24 -0400

Just fabulous

If you can pin me down in bed and hold my hand at dinner then you basically meet my standards

Tue, 18 Jun 2013 21:12:56 -0400

If you can pin me down in bed and hold my hand at dinner then you basically meet my standards

savemeamazeme: x

Tue, 18 Jun 2013 21:10:12 -0400

savemeamazeme:

x

xenoti: meowkeelymeow: yamisora: grapefruitshampoo: imnotther...

Tue, 18 Jun 2013 21:04:36 -0400

xenoti:

meowkeelymeow:

yamisora:

grapefruitshampoo:

imnotthereasonthatyoureinsane:

tephnos:

sirisles:

dixiesaurer:

aaronwarner-anderson:

mongezeas:

g0kudera:

sarahdesdemona:

ninth-level-of-awesome:

I love how Tumblr teaches us how to be perfect criminals.

Also, if you’re burying a full body, make sure you bury them vertically. Satellites orbiting earth look for holes that are approx. 6ft long because that’s suspicious. Ideally though, drain your body of fluids in a tub ((mix fluids with bleach and let them soak before draining and take precautions to keep your house from smelling like death from your sink and whatnot. Draining the body also keeps decomp at bay a bit and makes it easier to portion)) and cut it to bits. It’s easier to bury a head than a whole body, and takes less time so you don’t have to tell your neighbors, “Oh, I’m night gardening!”

Also, if a dog happens across it, it’s more likely it will devour a single body part than all of your ex-husband.

Another method is to put it into a septic tank. They’re a plethora of bacteria, and the smell of waste covers the smell of decomposition very well.

You should also destroy all teeth, massacre the face and burn fingerprints/remove finger tips to keep from identifying by anything other than DNA.

…I didn’t come up with these ideas, just what I’ve gleaned from reading on the internet.

i used to joke about Tumblr teaching us how to get away with murder, but fuck, man

the thing is when i see this i want to go kill a man just because i have the knowledge

thanks tumblr

Remember when you’re at the crime scene to wipe down all surfaces and then take the victims hands and touch things with them. Pick up cups and run the hands along table tops. A room with zero fingerprints is very suspicious.

If you live near the ocean you can drain the body and cut up the cadaver into small pieces then mix it all together with fish parts and dispose of it easily by pretending to chum the water for fish and sharks. Actually do chum the water a bit before dumping in your victim to be sure there are plenty of hungry fish around. Stick around and fish for a while so anyone who happens to see you won’t get suspicious. This way you don’t have any body parts lying around waiting to be dug up and identified. Plus you might catch a marlin or something.

PLUS YOU MIGHT CATCH A MARLIN

I AFDGFHGKJHKHGFDSF I AM DONE

Don’t forget that the chances of being caught are greatly reduced if you murder someone who has no connection to you at all. Most murderers end up killing someone they know in some fashion, so they’re easily caught. Serial killers kill at random, hence why they can kill a lot before they screw up.

I am not a serial killer, honest.

I am seriously concerned for all of you

please don’t judge me for tagging this for future reference, IT’S FOR PURELY FICTIONAL PURPOSES OK

seriously, the internet didn’t even start this…..CSI did

hello I am calling the police

That is one murderous Duck

A Hero at Heart.

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what if tattoos just randomly appeared on our skin at key points in our lives and we had to figure...

Photo

Photo

Just thought I should let you know you are very cute [:

fr4nk-the-bunny: self-distructive: myandrogynousthoughts: stac...

Photo

so-personal: relatable/humor blog if you Don’t smile I will...

Photo

wicked-youth: Below photos:” im lonely ;( looking for a tumblr girlfriend” Me: *throws up*

Photo

Photo

so-personal: relatable/humor blog if you Don’t smile I will...

Photo

Photo

so-personal: relatable/humor blog if you Don’t smile I will...

Just fabulous

If you can pin me down in bed and hold my hand at dinner then you basically meet my standards

savemeamazeme: x

xenoti: meowkeelymeow: yamisora: grapefruitshampoo: imnotther...

wicked-youth: Below photos:” im lonely ;( looking for a tumblr girlfriend” Me: throws up